Internal Conflict

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”
Romans 7:15

This honest confession from the Apostle Paul is a powerful reminder of our humanity. I remember when I was a kid watching a cartoon where the character was in the process of making a decision. Over one shoulder appeared a small being dressed like an angel who offered sound, responsible advise which would encourage the character to do something good. Over the other shoulder appeared another small being dressed like a devil who enticed the character to do something sinister. As these tiny beings were feeding the character with conflicting advice, the character would be distressed and confused. The reality is that the great temptation is to follow the advice of the "little devil" over your shoulder. However, we know that listening to the little devil may give us temporary satisfaction, but will result in guilt, shame and feelings of failure.

Have you ever felt distressed and confused? Have you ever had that mental and emotional conflict of wanting to do something that you shouldn't do that would satisfy you, but you know that you would hate yourself in the "morning"? Well, just know that you are not alone. I personally have fought this fight many times and have lost. Many times, I have allowed my feelings and desires to get the best of me leaving me in a place where I did something that I should not have done.

However I also know the victory of winning the fight. I know the pressure of resisting the temptations, and the feelings that I was going to go crazy if I didn't "scratch" that "itch". I realized that my Spirit is stronger than my flesh if I just hold on. It helps when I realize that I am not alone in this struggle. Even the great Apostle Paul had this struggle and, though he had his faults (by his own admission) he was a great warrior of the Christian faith. It helps me when I allow the Word of God to strengthen and encourage me when I feel pressure. It further helps me when I take my focus off of the thing that I am trying not to do, and focus on the thing that I want to do. For example, if I am trying to lose weight, I am not going to constantly focus on my weight and what foods to stay away from. Doing this will actually increase my desire to do what is contrary to what I want to do. Instead I am going to focus on exercise and healthy habits.

The same is true with life. Don't focus on what you don't want to do. Focus on what you want to do, who you want to be, and ultimately, the God you want to serve.

Much Love,

Pastor D

http://www.unlimitedimpact.org/

Did You Hear That?

"The LORD said, 'Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by.' Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. Then a voice said to him, 'What are you doing here, Elijah?'"
1Kings 19:11-13

Whenever I read this text, my idea of the sound of God's "voice" is challenged. I always imagine God's voice to have a powerful baritone pitch, with a reverberation that would make the walls shake. I always imagine God's voice being heard through dramatic means like a burning bush or an intense dream. I always imagine the movement of God to be through intense circumstances and startling revelations. However, this passage reminds me that though God can speak through flamboyant means, some of his most powerful communication comes through the gentleness of a whisper. The question is, "What does it take to hear a whisper?"

I can recall my son's first day of kindergarten. All of the parents escorted their children into the wonderfully decorated classroom with their children's names posted throughout. The Moms were holding back tears while the Dads were proudly poised with camcorders in hand. The teacher welcomed everyone to the first day of school. However the excitement and constant side conversations created a challenge to the teacher's attempt to bring order to the room. Then I witnessed a powerful teaching dynamic. The teacher just began to speak. She started speaking just loud enough for everyone to hear her voice. Then she began to speak softer and softer until she was almost whispering. Amazingly, the entire room came to a complete hush.

What does it take to hear a whisper? It takes silence. It takes a period of time without televisions, radios, iPods, cell phones, laptops and any other forms of audio/visual stimulation. It takes a practice of being in a silent environment, with a clear mind actively listening for a "whisper" from God. Did you hear that? God gently whispering, "I love you". Did you hear that? God gently whispering, "You are special to me". Did you hear that? God gently whispering, "I forgive you". Did you hear that? God gently saying, "You can do it...I believe in you". Did you hear that?

Let us challenge ourselves to take time out to dedicate ourselves to moments of silence. Not for the purpose of planning and processing, but for the sole purpose of positioning ourselves to hear a gentle whisper from God. Did you hear that?

Much Love,

Pastor D.